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LOVE: GAME OR NOT

Hello once again, this is your weird friend Ogah and I am here to write about what goes on in this crazy head of mine. Here is my take on the above subject matter love. But before I go on I would briefly like to talk about what other people have told me about this elusive four letter word. They say love ‘Died with the Titanic”. Because of our nature as humans, these set of people have become paranoid about other humans and the concept of love is more like a fairy tale. They believe that love is a game to be played between the “experienced” and the “naive”.

These “experienced” people know the exact words to say to the opposite sex to get through their defences. They are “like wolves in sheep cloths” they can say anything from little complements to overblown gestures just to win the heart of the other person. The experienced ones see this as a game. And you will ask me, what is their end game? The answer differs from “cash” to “kind”.
Some of these experienced lovers are in for the cash and others for the chase. Those that are in for the cash could resort to social vices like prostitution to get what they want or they look for some high-level- lonely society person who is looking for anyone who can just appreciate them for who they are. They know they are being lied to but there is something about paying someone a complement that makes the human mind bask in the euphoria of being a super hero. For instance, when a professional prostitute is servicing his/her client, he/she makes complements about his/her “endowments”, fakes an orgasm or asks him/her about their day, things that should be done by the clients’ spouses. The end-game here is sexual gratification and money.

The “naive” ones on the other hand are people who still believe that there are good people out there, who are worthy of their love and who they can love as well. These people get most of their inspiration from love songs, romantic novels and so on. These people have an ideal way of falling in love. Women are known to fall under this category. The possibility of men falling under this category is rare but it happens. These people cook up stories that resemble the same love stories that are seen in Disney movies. They are too quick to give their heart to their ideal soul mate without a proper background check, hence the term, LOVE IS BLIND. When they get heartbroken, they create a fence equipped with barbed wires with the height equivalent to the biblical tower of Babel around their hearts with bulldogs as ferocious as Cerberus the Guard dog of Hades.

These “naive” people mostly end up having a warped sense of love because as they say, experience is the best teacher. So, with that in mind, they end up using and refining the same techniques which was used on them on other “naive” people. They believe that is what love is all about. This is where the concept of THE CYCLE OF THE VICIOUS CIRCLE, kicks in.

Well, here is my take on the subject matter of love. It is true that I may not have given my heart to anyone and I am still single but that does not mean that I don’t believe in love. It means that I look at love in a different way. As a Christian, the bible makes us to understand that the human heart is indeed wicked and no one can understand it (Jeremiah 17:9). But the bible also admonishes us that we should be quick to listen and slow to speak. Naive people don’t read between the lines when they are in front of the opposite sex. There are men and women who want nothing personal to do with anyone and during a conversation; you should pick up on these signals. You should not be swayed by their “charms” to notice it. Unless you want to fall into their trap willingly with your eyes opened.

Please bear with me. I am not saying that love is a game of chess. If you read the previous paragraph about “naive” people, I said that they mostly end up having a warped sense of love, not all of them. Those who take pleasure in taking advantage of the opposite sex in the name of Love suffer from Self love and “Self love is self doubt” (From the movie Casanova: Francesca). Here is the kicker; even the experienced ones were once naive people. They were taught to brand their hearts with hot iron from their experiences or from other broken hearted people. You need to have the strength to get over the trauma of heart break and move on. It is easy to seduce an individual but it takes courage and self assurance to love. In other words, if you are a player, you are a coward.

There is nothing absolutely wrong with love and it should not be seen as a game. I believe everyone should be given a chance of love and if the opposite sex does not does not value it and sees it as a game to be played; it’s his/her loss. One should not “go off the deep end” because of heartbreak. You should see it as a positive lesson, that you are sure of yourself and you are capable of love. Wounded hearts take time to heal; so, give it time. And those who are ready to open their hearts for the first time make sure you are ready for the risks and gather enough “shock absorber” for any eventualities because the human heart is unpredictable.

For those of my readers out there that are participating in this gruesome act of playing with people’s hearts, my advice to you is to stop hiding behind your “bravado” and open your heart to someone who you know loves you before it is too late because like the song by Ricky Martin and Christina Aguilera “Nobody wants to be lonely”. Believe me I know what I am saying. If you can that one friend or confidant who truly loves you and can transform your weakness into strengths; then my friend, that is a keeper. Don’t just go after the superfluous, sexy, curvy lady (men) or hung, sexy, over-masculine men (ladies). Don’t get me wrong I like these qualities in a woman *wink* but if you can find a woman who loves you, then these factors will not count because a good heart overrides a BANGING BODY.

I’ll give my keyboard a rest with this bible passage. “Do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good” (Romans 12:21).

SO, ENJOY YOUR LIFE AND EXCEL!

You can reach me on my facebook page www.facebook.com/iexcel360
E-mail: johnnyogah2000@gmail.com

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